get typed by sofie

face me on zoom... if you dare 👁

face me on zoom... if you dare 👁

typing call with sofie

a typing session with me includes:

  • ~60 minute Zoom call with me, we won’t stop before your heart has been properly dissected

  • my approach is structural, breaking down your archetype into its essential bits: center theory is my 5 brain’s passion

  • recording of our call to rewatch and share with a hidden youtube link

  • graphic with your typing details + your trifix archetype symbol

  • follow-up questions during your typing crisis on discord

  • if you’re a patreon god, you’ll receive a €5 discount - just PP €55 and include your discord name

  • after payment, you may send me collages, your cringe poetry or social media accounts if you are extra keen on being seen from all angles

  • i’ll reach out to you via god mail or on discord to schedule our seance to call upon your heart

  • if you are eager to know your type, this option has a faster turnaround - usually within 7 days after booking

  • ich spreche auch deutsch, falls du ein erbe goethes bist

€60 EUR

typing video dissection + roast 🧿

typing video dissection + roast 🧿

typing video submission with sofie

i type, roast and analyse your video offering

includes:

  • questions for you to answer on video (will be sent to you after successful payment)

  • ~60-90 minute recording by me, analysing and structurally explaining your type & patterns (elitist snobbery and potential giovanni cameo to be expected)

  • trailer, explanatory in-video links and outro summing up your typing details

  • typing includes core + wing, trifix + ghost trifix (wings on fixes) + instinctual stacking

  • follow-up questions on discord when you have your typing crisis

what happens:

  • 25 minute time limit on your video submission (yes, that is enough, i won’t dissect the 3 hour tragic tale of your life)

  • you may send me your art, collages, your social media feed, or whatever you feel is relevant to your character - i’ll include these in my analysis

  • turnaround is roughly 5-21 days after I receive your video, depending on demand. please note, I may email you a clarifying question.

  • no discount for discord gods as the video submission is significantly more time-consuming for me to edit and finalise

€65 EUR

typing call with sofie

60 minutes over zoom

Availabilities: Monday - Wednesday 8-10am UTC, Monday - Thursday 7-9pm UTC, flexible on weekends. or write to enneagod@gmail.com to schedule outside of the above-mentioned window.

____

sofie will bring a torch into the labyrinthine corridors of mind and show you around in undying hope of uncovering the warped shape of your true heart. her approach is both intuitive as it is analytical, dissecting your full archetype and instinctual neurosis to feed it to you in its structural bits. sofie’s eyes will look behind the veil of your beliefs and deduct their origin. one X-ray session of your sleeping soul extends at least 60+ minutes.

…and many more typing videos posted on discord.

join and watch them all!

  • "You had me laughing and crying and thinking. I feel very seen... This has been an outstanding experience."

  • Goblins of Discord Has Ruined My Life!

    In the best way possible, of course. Being a core 6, I had spent four years trying to figure out my Tritype and spinning my wheels as I considered every possible image fix and gut fix, and finally landed on 692 for myself. But within a few days of sending in my video, I got the results back – a 613. It made sense, it all clicked, and I spent the next month thinking about it (as 6s do) and trying to find the faults in it. There were none. They got me dead to rights, and any attempt by me to squirm out of it, has always come back to “they were right.” Since I’ve been doing inner work for eight years, once they “showed me” a few things in their video analysis about how that type works inside of myself, I’ve done nothing but notice my fixes “in action” every minute of every day. Hence the life-ruiner part, because now I can’t indulge in relentless over-thinking and pointless speculation about my fixes any more. The mystery of me is solved, which is both reassuring and frustrating!

  • "You were both amazing and the whole typing process was very well structured. I felt at ease and was very impressed how clearly you saw the types playing out and how you described it... I'm really happy with this newfound clarity and lens to observe."

  • "Getting typed by GOD was such an exciting and valuable experience that I wish I could do it again. Their questions are clever and creative and their observations are spot-on. I’m extremely grateful for their willingness to engage with my questions about my typing—their insight helped me not only to see a path ahead for personal growth but also to understand the Enneagram itself better. 🖤"

    Rénee

  • If you are on the fence about being typed by them, go for it. They are not mean and do not force their opinions on you, but leave you to decide if it fits or not, so it is a pleasant experience (you will get lightly roasted, but it’s all in good fun). It’s also worth a lot to be able to watch them react to and discuss you and provide reasoning as to why they think you are what you are, instead of just sending you an answer without an explanation. Maybe they know it that a lot of their clients will be 6s for whom “it must make sense.” - Charity / Funky MBTI in Fiction

  • "It was so much fun and I learned so much about myself during the process... I highly recommend to anyone interested in learning more about Enneagram and wanting to get typed!"

  • "I loved the roast, you brought a tear to my eye! I will treasure this video for the rest of time!"

  • "Being typed feels amazing... they did a great job of explaining the wings... it cleared up a lot of confusion."

FAQ

for the 6s

  • i am more flexible within the CET time zone. ask me on discord @knulla or write GOD on enneagod@gmail.com

  • too bad. no refunds.

  • if you cancel last minute, you better have good reason to do so (an elaborate story will appease me more than a pity party).

    if you change your mind after purchasing but before our call, we don’t offer refunds. goblins are greedy!

    if you ghost then god will keep your money. how lucky for us goblins!

  • you may not! we provide our goblins with a typing crisis service in our discord for all your upcoming questions. if you want to have a back & forth, at least other gobs will learn something. i won’t be sending endless mails to you.

  • no one is “qualified” to type, but we are the best option you have. centers of intelligence & the law of three are the oracle bones of our process.

  • sofie, the thinking heart, will use her 5 brain knife to dissect your trifix into its structural bits. if you have a lot of questions or want to understand your type better, she’s your passive force.

    mary lydia, the doing heart, will lift you up and send her heart beam to illuminate your core. she is a kind, loving and strict mommy, educated in a variety of healing modalities. if you need extra reassurance and magical fairy dust, get her active force on the call.

    alex, the heart-sworn god of gods, may or may not reveal herself on video. her energy will press against yours to assess your type + vibe with her omnipotent tuning fork. her separated 5 head will hover over your video and coldly judge your character. if you want her bad hexy to give you shivers, she is the invisible force to have in your typing video submission.

  • your best option is to join our discord server via patreon for €2-5/month. you can post a typing video and let our bril iant gobs have a shot. you won’t receive an official typing but the feedback can be illuminating.

    on discord we have monthly draws among the sugar goblins. the winner will pick an untyped goblin to be typed by sofie. be interesting enough, maybe you’re lucky.

  • reach us at enneagod@gmail.com